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Hi readers my name is Wayne :) A true Singaporean living his life. Saturday, February 25, 2012
Everything that goes up must come down. Good times never last. Tough times never last. Time waits for nobody. Nothing matters. Life in AI just got really hard. Everything is a downward spiral. The good times were too good to be true. The contrast too harsh. This coming week my syndicate has gotten -2 for our bunk not being in stand by area condition. I would need to book in at 8. To add on to my misery I'm on guard duty this saturday and I'll miss my niece's birthday. I'll lose my precious time to doing something of absolutely no meaning to me. Life's a dream and a nightmare. When it's good it's out of this world. When it's bad its just hell on earth. Its a matter of time before army sends me to IMH for a review. Very soon I won't even be sane anymore. I have lost sight of life after army. My life before army gradually leaving me. All i've been feeling is all dread pain misery. Nothing cheers me up. Gradually I'm being led to think that death is an option. As fast as time seems to be passing, Waking up every morning has been becoming harder and harder, I'm losing my appitite, I've lost the sense of excitement I feel dull I'm so bored of my life There's nothing left for me, I've become indifferent. I think I've completely broken down to pieces. I don't know when but somewhere along the line something snapped. once broken some things can't be mended
Save me. Somebody pls Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Pain. I'm in Pain. Physical PAIN. I just hate this PAIN It restricts me. I binds me. Pain.
Save me. Somebody pls Sunday, January 8, 2012
9 weeks have passed since I first entered national service. New friends were made, Memories were made, Injuries suffered. But through it all I survived. I honestly think that I am really not an active person. And no matter what happens I only do what is necessary, But up till now I still can't seem to do pushups, It really hurts... and well I dunno how I'm gonna survive unit life... I've got bout 7 days of rest and I'm definitely going meet 5 group of friends. 123<3 3b11 Taurus Platoon 2 Section 2 HRH Girl~Friends HAHA is 7 days even enough? Saturday, January 7, 2012
I'm graduated from BMT... It really is damn fast and that they do say BMT is the best time of your NS. Reason = 0 responsibility NS is just another job in a different environment once you get posted to a unit. But seriously working in a job that I've got no passion for really stinks. But it's ok I'll still try my best to stay alive! I never thought I would complete my 24km route march. Honestly halfway I was already crying and thinking of giving up. Than I heard Lionel tell me stop acting weak.... It just spurred me on for my next few steps ! And the only moti moti motivation I had was from knowing that during the Graduating Parade A lot of my family and friends will be there to watch me! I have no self pride, I do it for them, not me.
Save me. Somebody pls Saturday, December 31, 2011
One more week and I am out of BMT! It's been real quick and I'm thankful non of the injuries I have sustained during BMT will kill me A few of it will stick with me for the rest of my life... But overall I'm good! I completed my 16 km road march... Now all that's left is 24km and Graduation Parade! I just hope I stay healthy enough till next saturday! Woot!!!! POP lo! Haiz I'm gonna miss the friends I've made that much I'm sure... But life goes on ... Just when you think everything's over, Life comes back to kick you in the nut!
Save me. Somebody pls Friday, December 23, 2011
Before I knew it 20 days have passed since I last blogged... I shall start by saying Army has taught me how to feel pain, From chest pains to sprained ankle to injuring some of the tendons and now a 40 degree fever. Is this like a test from god to how much shit my body can take ? Or is it to test how strong my mind is ? The pure capabilities of pushing my body to the limits! To exceed a new level of threshold! What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! That's what my Platoon Commander said anyway.. But seriously I really feel damn fucked up especially with this fever that doesn't go down at all. One of my bunkmate commented " Its not your body that's weak, its your mind thats weak" So I guess mind over body hence my weak mind is causing me to crash... But seriously I really dun feel as fit as the rest of the people in my batch... Guess I should have gone for PTP instead of enhanced with Taurus which broke me. I fell out of field camp ... even though it was the most slack camp there was. I almost had to recourse the whole of BMT. But thanks to the support of my whole platoon i managed to push myself beyond my limit! And I passed my IPPT thus qualifying me for Attended BMT! POP on 7 JAN... Can't foresee my near future but one thing is for sure I'm definitely gonna try to recover as much as possible! Endure all that comes at you Persevere through all the hardships Tolerate all the bullshit people throw at you Only that will you stand above the rest as the superior one!
Save me. Somebody pls Sunday, December 4, 2011
Listening to my various playlists makes me feel better. My soul really grooves to the bass the sadness the emotions. But I really wanna hear all my playlists while I'm in army... Give me some internet and I'll be way way way happier! Haha! Manga I can always read in one shot I have no problem with that .... But without music life really seems damn boring.... Army songs just don't have the spirit. It's just words without meaning... Saturday, December 3, 2011
I hate having so little time to myself... Just having so little time for my M&M sickens me! Even when I was working full time full shift, I could still dig out time for my friends for my activities. I could always control parts and parcels of my life, but know I locked away in a jail cell for 1 year and 10 months, Serving a sentence that will only end in 21 more months... Freedom is something I treasure a lot, I only one to be tied down to things I choose to be tied down to. Freedom. I want it back!
Save me. Somebody pls Next week's Field Camp and GRENADE LOUD LOUD... All my high key events are passing so quickly ... Thanks to all the medication i'm on i'm recovering but I don't know if it's fast enough for me to survive field camp. I'm really damn worried I won't be able to last the whole field camp cause of how weak I am... Haiz.... On a side note I failed IPPT again cause of 2.4 km run... My fatal weakness of poor breathing has come back to haunt me again... Oh god and stop giving me new injuries. A sprained ankle is really killing me... I miss all my friends other than yi ling and flora I haven seen the rest of you for more than 1 month... Longing makes the heart fonder It aches for you so Save me. Somebody pls Saturday, November 26, 2011
My life has been a cycle of 0530 - 2230 for the past three weeks, I've never felt so weak and pathetic ever. Maybe cause i've never really worked out seriously, But the number of injury i've sustained are really demoralising. From head down I can feel my felt shoulder, my lower back, my right lower leg... Haiz really sucks big time I swear... I have already visited the medical center 3 times... 3 god damned times to see my various aliments but to no avail.... This whole week I was just recovering from fever after getting an excuse to skip PT which is why I managed to book out in one piece... The next 2 weeks will determine whether I pass or fail BMT.... 6km route march in FBO, Field Camp, Official IPPT, Live Range... HOLY SHIT! HAHA ... Honestly I want to Pass out with my current section mates... They are all really nice to me and help me out on the days when I feel my weakest, When I have High fever, When I have chest pains and breathlessness, When my limbs are just numb, just to name how useless I am when I'm in camp... My Commanders are all very nice too! Without their support I would not even be able to survive this long... I really want to be together with everyone on 7 January to Pass out of BMT... Haiz....
Voices from my heart <3 ...
Cheryl(: Flora(: YiLing(: 1b23(: Danial(: Estelle(: Hui Ting(: Steffi(: Youjing(: Fion(: YeSiang(: 
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